Book Log: New Moon, Clementine, Small Steps

55. New Moon, by Stephenie Meyer

Bella Swan's relationship with her hot vampire boyfriend Edward Cullen is heating up when her characteristic clumsiness messes everything up again at her vampire-thrown birthday party. In typical Bella style, she gives herself a paper cut and Edward has to literally throw himself in front of her to keep her from being dinner for six hungry vampires. That's the last straw for Edward, and he and his entire family pick up and leave to prevent any more harm from coming to Bella on their tab. Bella is, of course, inconsolable, and walks through life like a lovesick zombie - until she renews her friendship with local boy Jacob Black. Jacob is a good friend - and more importantly, he helps Bella fix up two motercycles and teaches her to ride them. Bella's friendship with Jacob - and the adrenaline rush that the motercycles bring - sustains her, until she discovers a dangerous truth about the identity of Jacob and his friends - they are a pack of young werewolves. And even worse, they have been working to protect her from a vicious vampire who has it in for Bella.

After the horrible drudge that was Twilight, New Moon was a pleasant surprise. At least, part of it was, if you can get past Bella's melodramatic, lovesick, woe-is-me-I-am-the-center-of-the-universe depression. I was actually starting to enjoy Bella's somewhat odd relationship with Jacob, and the book in general, which kind of surprised me - until Edward showed up again. Then, the writing dissolved once again to "I love you more, shmoopy." "No, I love you more." and I lost patience once again. That's the problem with this book. The shmoopy, syrupy, unexplainededly irritating Romeo-and-Juliet True Love that Edward and Bella share. I like Bella with Alice. I like Bella with Carlisle and Esme. I like Bella with Jacob. I can't stand Bella with Edward. And let me rephrase that. There is nothing likeable about Bella as a character - she is a complete and total MarySue. Jacob is goodhearted and clever and interesting, and I have no trouble understanding why Bella is drawn to him. But why is Jacob drawn to Bella? There seems to be no reason I can understand. And most laughable of all is Bella's desperate urge to become a vampire herself. Especially at the end, when Edward asks her to marry him first, and she balks. She's afraid of commitment, but not of being turned into a vampire so she can stay with him always? Give me a break.

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56. Clementine, by Sara Pennypacker

Let me introduce you to Clementine.

"I have had not so good of a week.

Well, Monday was a pretty food day, if you don't count Hamburguer Surprise at lunch and Margaret's mother coming to get her. Or the stuff that happened in the principal's office when I got sent there to explain that Margaret's hair was not my fault and besides she looks okay without it, but I couldn't, because Principal Rice was gone, trying to calm down Margaret's mother.

Someone should tell you not to answer the phone in the principal's office, if that's a rule.

Okay, fine, Monday was not so good of a day."

Clementine is in third grade. People are always saying, "pay attention, Clementine!" without actually paying attention themselves. Like, Clementine was the only one to notice that the art teacher's scarf had a stain on it that looked just like a pelican when you squinted. Clementine is always paying attention, just not always to the same things as everyone else. Clementine is best friends with Margaret, who is in fourth grade and is nearly perfect, and she has a little brother named Brussel Sprout - or Lima Bean, or Cabbage. Because if she has to have a fruit name, then he has to have a vegetable name! Clementine tends to get into trouble more often than average, but she can't seem to help it!

Clementine is kind of like Kix cereal - kid tested, mother approved. Have you read the Junie B. Jones books? If you have, you probably know that kids love her because she talks like a kid, and adults can't stand her because it's just bad. Junie's atrocious grammar and misuse of words is almost painful to read, and she is oversilly. Clementine, on the other hand, also talks like a kid, but she is delightful. She's the Junie B. Jones for the kid who doesn't like stupidity. She's smart and clever and completely kidlike, and her rambling train of thought reminds me of talking to my little brother. She is completely adorable, and I read large parts of this book out loud to N before handing him the book and making him read the whole thing. N likes nonfiction, but only reluctantly reads fiction when I shove it at him - and he eagerly devoured Clementine whole. She is delightful, and even if you have no 7-9 year old to give her to, I highly recommend you go read Clementine for yourself.

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57. Small Steps, by Louis Sachar

Last we saw Armpit, he was digging holes at Camp Green Lake. Now, Armpit (nicknamed for a wasp bite on his armpit) is still digging holes, but now he's getting paid for it, working for a landscaper in his hometown of Austin, TX. Armpit (or Theodore, as he prefers to be called) is trying to straighten his life out after two years of juvie, while everyone is expecting the worst of him. The only person who believes in him is his feisty ten-year-old neighbor Ginny, who has cerebral palsy. He is earning honest money and going to summer school and trying to stay on the straight and narrow. His life is slowly beginning to get back on track when X-Ray, his old buddy from Camp Green Lake, shows up, with a double-your-money ticket-scalping scheme. Armpit fronts him the money, and ends up taking Ginny to the concert. An incident at the concert vaults him and Ginny into arms of teen pop star Kaira deLeon - and into more excitement that Armpit expected.

There are certain books that come together perfectly, as if the author has stumbled across the secret - and it is almost certain that, even though they will write other excellent books, they will never hit upon that secret to perfection again. Holes was one of those books, and as such, Small Steps is not. It is, however, quite a good book on its own. It is a quieter book. It lacks the excitement and magic of all the pieces coming together, of a generation-spanning curse and a rags-to-riches happy ending. But it has something possibly much better. Armpit never gets the happily ever after. What he has are the small, more realistic steps on the way to a happy life. He is realistic and world-wise, and even as Sachar keeps telling us that he has violent tendancies (what sent him to Camp Green Lake in the first place) we keep seeing his gentle side. His relationship with Ginny (especially in contrast with his relationship with Kaira) is wonderful to read, and I'd love to read a Ginny-centric book. I especially enjoyed the lack of a happily ever after ending. Armpit is not a character who would be comfortable with a fairy tale ending. Armpit is a character who wants to work his way to a succesful life on the straight and narrow, and as such, he is a character we can sincerely care about and relate to, and cheer for every step of the way.